Tag Archives: Emotional intelligence

Courage to walk unarmed

A Nation of Cowards

Jeffrey Snyder suggests that carrying a handgun is both a right and a duty of every law-abiding citizen.

This is hard for me to relate to; as, for all practical purposes, no such people exist in my world.

Gun lovers’ slogans include, “When guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns.” Forget laws; in my world, only outlaws have guns now.

I have no impulse to join them.
Continue reading Courage to walk unarmed

“Francis” and the phonograph

Today is my youngest brother’s 65th birthday, and a good occasion for me to pay tribute to him as an inspiration and role model.

He’s six years my senior.  We have two other brothers, one 7½ and one 9 years my senior.

Let’s see if I can compose this before my Net access runs out for today, 45 minutes from now.

Continue reading “Francis” and the phonograph

This Ancient Philosophy Is What We Desperately Need In Our Modern Lives

Another link from Brian Williard:

This Ancient Philosophy Is What We Desperately Need In Our Modern Lives

Growing up, all the word “Stoic” meant to me was keeping a stiff upper lip in the face of adversity.

Not until 1989, when I was taking the Synoptics course at St. Mary’s Seminary, did I learn — from Sean Freyne’s The World of the New Testament, which I highly recommend for many reasons — that there is a great deal more to it, including much to like.

Stoicism is a life of ordered joy.

As you read this article, please note the many similarities between the approach to life described there, and the things I have said here about presence.

Carolyn Gregoire also wrote the first article I mentioned about emotional intelligence,  “How emotionally intelligent are you?”

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And yet another link from Brian Williard:

Google’s ‘Jolly Good Fellow’ On The Power Of Emotional Intelligence

Looks like links to Carolyn Gregoire are becoming pretty common on this blog.

Don’t scoff at the headline.  From the gentleman in question here, Chade-Meng Tan, comes another ringing endorsement of meditation and presence as I have discussed them.  I note that the first exercise described in the article is tantamount to what I call prayer, and practically the same as I proposed in “You don’t need an invitation to love people.”

(Originally posted 2014-06-21.)

A first look at meditation

Although I constantly refer to “silence” and “presence,” I have put off posting any how-to here about meditation, since there are innumerable resources out there and I don’t want to re-invent the wheel.   I may eventually post a how-to here.

In the meantime, Brian Williard sent me the below link that I can’t ignore.

I’d urge anyone who’s interested in meditation, or in learning how to meditate, to read it.  Actually, I’d encourage anyone who’s not engaged in meditation now, to read it.

Son Meditation in the Midst of Turmoil

Continue reading A first look at meditation

The Life Force: Use and abuse

Emmet Fox’s “Your Heart’s Desire” begins:

“An old adage says, ‘God has a plan for every man, and He has one for you,’ and this is absolutely correct.  Your real problem, therefore, in fact the only problem that you ever have, is to find your true place in life.  Find that, and everything else will follow almost automatically.  You will be perfectly happy; and upon happiness, health will follow.  You will be really prosperous.  You will have all the supply that you require to meet your needs, and this means that you will have perfect freedom; for poverty and freedom cannot go together. Until you do find your true place in life, however, you never will be really happy, no matter how much money or distinction you may acquire; and until you are happy, you will be neither healthy nor free.”

This scenario of health, happiness and prosperity is similar enough to the discussion of self-esteem in “Courage to Walk Unarmed” and to previous discussions here of emotional intelligence or wisdom.

Later in Fox’s piece comes what I regard as the premiere text about right and wrong use of the life force:

“There is only one Fundamental Energy in the universe, but this energy may be applied by us either constructively or destructively, because God has given us Free Will.  When we use it constructively, we are acting in harmony with the Will of God, and we are improving ourselves and our lives in every possible respect, and we are helping the world in general, too.  When we use it destructively, we damage ourselves, retard our progress, and waste an opportunity of helping mankind at large.

“We use our energy destructively whenever we think or talk fear and limitation; whenever we grumble, or give way to self-pity, or indulge in useless regrets, or, in fact, in any form of negative thinking.  Most of all do we use our God given energy destructively when we hold thoughts of criticism and condemnation of others.  All bitterness, resentment, spiritual pride, and self-righteousness, are peculiarly disastrous methods of misusing the Great Power, and that is why such thinking causes the terrible havoc that it does in people’s lives.

“When we are in a condition of fear, anger, or worry, our Divine Energy, instead of flowing, in some positive, creative work, becomes dammed up within ourselves, like the water in the garden hose, and produces all sorts of trouble in soul and body.  Meanwhile, our true work in life is either missed altogether, or, starved of the supply of Life Force which it should receive, it languishes accordingly, and we get mediocrity, poverty, and failure.”

One’s “true work in life” refers to what Fox calls “your heart’s desire:” the unique way you and you alone can “let your light so shine” as to maximize benefit to yourself and others.

Mis-use of the life force creates poverty.

Wealth doesn’t create happiness; happiness creates wealth.

We will explore this more in subsequent posts.

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This is the second in a series of five posts:
“Just how bad do you think you’ve got it?” – September 27, 2018
The Life Force: Use and abuse – Today
Co-creators with God – October 11, 2014
The wandering will – October 18, 2014
The path of presence – October 25, 2018

(Originally posted 05/17/14.)

“Soft” and “hard” skills in school; and other news

Bookmarks:
Socialization technique helps in academic achievement, trial study finds
Caitlyn Virts, Relisha Tenau Rudd amber alerts
Paul Ryan and the brown bag
Woman’s brain scanned during astral projection

Continue reading “Soft” and “hard” skills in school; and other news

Job search update, 03/03/14

Update 02/28/14 here.

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Tuesday 2014-02-11.  My prospect for the City job fell through this morning.

Some may find this story TMI, but I will get it out more quickly if I don’t try to trim it.  To cut to the chase, click here.

The listing came up in my search engine results, probably in August, that the City was accepting applications for the title of Secretary II.  Interested people could first apply, then take the appropriate exams, and if they passed they would be put on an eligibility list for positions with this title throughout City government.  The work site for any position could be anywhere.

In September I took and passed those exams.
Continue reading Job search update, 03/03/14

The dark side of EQ

(Originally posted 02/08/14.)

Adam Grant, The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence
Daniel Goleman, An Antidote to the Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence

Dilemma:  a hammer can be used either to build a house or to destroy priceless heirlooms.  Possessing the tool of emotional intelligence does not mean one will use it favorably.  What makes the difference?

In anticipating this post, I searched for a traditional term for “emotional intelligence.”  I decided that the traditional term for it is wisdom. The Old Testament consistently refers to people who have emotional intelligence as “wise.”  Those who lack it, it calls “fools.”

In the previous post, we saw that emotional intelligence, or wisdom, is a major determinant of personal effectiveness and success in life; in short, of prosperity.  To the extent one wishes all people to prosper, it seems desirable that all people be wise.

In short, the wise prosper.

But the wise aren’t necessarily good, and the good aren’t necessarily wise.
Continue reading The dark side of EQ

How emotionally intelligent are you? Here’s how to tell.

(Originally posted 02/01/14.)

How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? Here’s How To Tell

If you’re in a boat out on the water, and a storm comes up, and the boat’s rocking and at risk of tipping over; it’s critical to turn the boat to face into the wind.  This won’t stop the wind, but will keep it from rocking the boat.

Emotional intelligence is like that.  It won’t make life’s storms go away, but can help keep them from rocking your boat.

In my view, emotional intelligence is the same as emotional maturity or psychological or spiritual maturity.  This is what spiritual growth is all about.
Continue reading How emotionally intelligent are you? Here’s how to tell.